My first reaction/response for everything now is 'I don't really care'. In essence, I'm a coward. 

When I talk about me, all I get are hard questions and criticism. This is why I don't want to talk about myself anymore. This is why I am shutting down from people. I'm like an auto-bot with the perfect answers but in reality my wires are all tangled up inside. 

This time its for real and there isn't anything I can do about it.

It feels as if I stopped living my life even before it started. I think somewhere along the way I forgot how to and settled for watching others live theirs.